Dear Friends & Family,
Last week we sent out our
Family Update and requested prayer for my father’s condition. Five days later,
at __ a.m., Dad passed away with my hand on his shoulder, and
with Mary and David standing together with us.
Since we sent our update last
week, many people have prayed with us as we dealt with this difficult situation.
Thank you for your involvement and words of encouragement as we hoped in His
mercy.
We believe that these past five
days were an expression of God’s mercy, extending Dad’s life and giving us many
more opportunities to share Christ with him. In those final days, my Dad was
surrounded by our visiting family members each night, and then with Mary and I
staying “on watch” through the nights with him after everyone left.
We needed wisdom as we handled
Dad’s care in our home. Two times this week one of the visiting nurses came from
hospice strongly encouraging us to use the low-dose morphine to “ease your
father into the next life,” even though we and other nurses who had observed his
heavy breathing felt that my father was not in any distress or pain. We opted
against her advice and believe that minimizing the medicines allowed us to have
more opportunities to talk to him.
Mary and I continued daily to
witness to my father through singing hymns, sharing God’s Word, praying with and
for him, relating memories, expressing forgiveness and release, and including
each suggestion that came to us from those of you who wrote to encourage us.
Even David talked with his grandfather and told him that he wanted Grandpop to
go to heaven.
During these last days of my
father’s life, he was unable to communicate with us, except through an
occasional hand squeeze, slight shake of the head, or almost inaudible word
which we could not understand. Even though we had to rely on these minimal and
subtle signs of demeanor, we believe that in the final 24 hours of Dad’s life,
several special things occurred.
On Monday afternoon, David and
I had visited with a Christian neighbor, Mr. Smith, who I had only met
twice before, to ask if he could help my mother in the future with
little household needs. Mr. Smith is a building contractor and handyman, and
as a believer, he agreed to be available in the future if he could
help.
As I awakened early Tuesday
morning, I was impressed by the Lord to call Mr. Smith and to ask him to come
to witness to my father. When I called him to make my request, he said that his
last prayer the night before was that he would have an opportunity to come and
witness to my Dad. He was just waiting for my call!
He came to our house around 8
a.m. before going to his first job for the day, and with the hospice nursing
aide standing nearby, presented the Gospel to my father. Mr. Smith talked
directly with my Dad, using words of encouragement, including the way that Mom
would be taken care of when my father was gone. My father seemed to hear and
respond in a more affirming manner, which was unlike the many other times Mary
and I shared with him before, when he would often show signs of
agitation.
Finally, that last night, after
my brother, sister, and Mom had all gone, Mary and I talked with my father
again about the Lord, and the salvation available through Jesus Christ. I
affirmed that we all loved him very much, and he was the very best Dad I could
ever have. I held him in my arms, and hugged him so he could feel our love for
him. I told him that if he had believed in Christ, he could go in peace, but if
he did not, then I believed God was keeping him alive until he would
surrender.
As I stepped back, we saw a
tear come out of his left eye, and almost all of his facial expressions while we
were sharing were peaceful, similar to the ones earlier that morning when Mr. Smith spoke with him. After hugging him again, and telling him repeatedly that
we loved him, forgave him, and many other special things, he seemed to go to
sleep. Through the night and early morning hours, Mary and I sat with him,
again sharing, singing, praying, and pleading with Dad to cease struggling and
receive the peace Christ wanted to give him through faith.
On Wednesday morning after the
nursing aide was gone, Dad’s breathing slowed. Mary called me from watching David downstairs (who often bounded through the house with great energy and
noise enough to alarm my Dad), and I came upstairs to hold my Dad and talk
gently with him. He winced twice, and then quietly slumped back down as his
failing heart gave way and his breathing came to a stop. It was a very peaceful
departure.
In reflecting on the past few
days since the last Family Update, we wanted to thank you for your prayers as we
put our hope in God’s mercy. We cannot say for certain that Dad received
Christ, but a few days before, whenever he seemed to resist or grimace as we
shared, Mary and I had prayed that the Lord would “shew me a token for good”
and I believe God has answered those prayers.
Thank you again for your
prayers, love, and support during this precious season we have had with my
Dad.
